A Pause for Fall

Worst Game Ever

Oh Milton Bradley, what were you thinking? I mean the title alone is snooze worthy, "Conserving Natural Resources Game and Poster Cards". You could have at least tricked us with "Eco Eco Dinosaurs" and just not had any dinosaurs involved, or "Don't Break the World" with a cartoon guy balancing the earth on a stick...and then make the boring contents be the same. But you made the title a warning, which I suppose is a good thing. Because no kid (nor adult) in their right mind would consider playing this game. Was this some sort of community service in game form, did some kids choke on the small plastic pieces from one of your fun games, so the government punished you into making this? That's gotta be it, because this is like cardboard Ambien.

Now, I'm all for conservation, and I love the earth, but I don't like to be tricked. Educational stuff that's disguised as "fun" bothers me, in fact it even bothered me when I was young, and I didn't fall for it then either. Oh, word games...lame, flash cards...lame, conserving natural resources game and poster cards...lame squared. See, I just squared "lame", and it was somewhat educational...that was lame. School's supposed to be boring, and toys/games are supposed to be fun. We go through one...to get to the other. I'm not sure which one didn't get the memo, Milton or Bradley, but they both needed to be fired.


"Who wants to play Conserving Natural Resources Game and Poster Cards??"

"I wanna be Stripmining!" "I'm Clearcutting!"

It's not lost on me that this game is for schools, and since it's from 1971, this ecology theme was popular (Hippies). But even back then, if I saw the teacher grabbing this down from a shelf, I'd be like "Ohhhh crap!", and my mind would think about Scooby Doo.

When I first got this, I thought the cover was sun faded, but no. It's monochromatic blue, like the printer ran out of the other two pigments needed to make the full spectrum. "Ehhh, no big deal. Nobody's gonna play it anyway. Ship em out!". It sucks, and the game board, conservation cards, spinner, all of the game parts, they all suck too. I know that's a generalization, but what do you expect from me...I didn't pay attention in school!

Here's the scene, a large cave-like room, flames, distant screams, and a devil guy sitting at a desk. There are all these tattered, soot covered lost souls wandering around and sitting at tables. A fresh guy walks in, suit is still clean, hair all combed. Devil guy looks up. "Hello, Mr Jones. Welcome to Hell. You'll be spending eternity in this room, but the good news is, the game closet is right over there." He points his pitchfork toward the closet doors. Mr. Jones walks over. "Oh, well...this isn't so bad." He opens both doors wide, and all he sees are dusty bare shelves, except for one thing...Conserving Natural Resourses Game and Poster Cards. "Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"


Fin

Down Time

I'm a bit busy re-arranging my office space right now...soooo, I won't have a lot of new posts. I'll be back at it in a few weeks. In the mean time watch some fine television shows, read a book, take a walk, enjoy the internets. The world is your oyster!

Cool Find: Sept 12

If you were a kid in the '60s or '70s, you might remember Funny Face drink mixes by Pillsbury. They were a Kool-Aid like drink mix, but each flavor had a character, rather than one main guy like Mr. Kool-Aid...OH YEAH! Funny Face had some pretty cool mail-order promo stuff too, the drink cups, some ramp-walkers, pillows, and the larger item in my picture there, the Pitcher.

I've had all the cups (mugs) for some time now, but have been looking for a pitcher. I finally found the Goofy Grape pitcher at the Coburg Oregon Antique Fair this last weekend. It'll look cool in my advertising collection.

An interesting note about the character names. There were two flavors, Injun Orange and Chinese Cherry, that were changed out of race sensitivity. They were later called Jolly Olly Orange, and Choo-Choo Cherry. You can see them in the below commercial.

Nutty Mad Men

I've been watching Mad Men on AMC, and of course being a retro-head, I love it. The items in the background, the clothes, the products they talk about, love it, love it, love it. I watched the very first episode, the very first time it aired...Ohhhhh, I'm so hip!

Actually, I was drawn to it for obvious reasons (I'm not that hip). It's set in a time I really like as a collector and vintage dealer, the early to mid '60s. When design was almost more important than function. The lamps were rocket sleek, couches broad and flat, suits dangerously sharp, and the products were frivolous. The "Ad Men" were more than happy to tell us why we needed all these items, and as a naive nation, we were more than happy to eat it up. Things haven't changed much since then, at least in the world of advertising. Manipulation is easy when it's plugged into emotion.

This 1960s Marx Nutty Mads figure is named Suburban Sidney. He's a whacked out business man commuting on a tricycle, his briefcase flung out for balance, tie flapping in the breeze, and little hat perched on a crazed head. He's pretty much the opposite of Don Draper. I think Don could commute on a tricycle and make it look good...damn him.

Cool Find: Aug. 7

Sea Monkeys are an enigma, they're a blatant rip-off, yet everyone accepts that. In fact, they not only accept the false advertising by the Sea Monkey folks...they love them because of it! They're right up there with the X-Ray Specs that were also sold in comic books, we all fell for the joke. It's all part of learning a lesson as a kid I guess, it's almost like the government gives them permission to teach us all a lesson about frivolous spending. How many kids have uttered "What the hell, creepy little shrimp? Where's the little family? They don't even have faces, what the hell?!" That's when dad would walk by, "Seeeee, I told you to save your money."

Lesson learned. Thanks Sea Monkeys!

You gotta love them though. It's more the concept of Sea Monkeys, rather than than the reality of them. They really play on the every kid wants a pet monkey thing.

This was one of my weekend finds, an unusual item from the world of Sea Monkeys. It's the Living Sea Gem. A '60s era necklace that you were supposed to put a Sea Monkey in and wear around. Sorta like a hamster ball, but for wierd little shrimp. I'm not sure if you were supposed to kidnap the mother, the father, or one of the kids for this excursion that would surely end in death...but no matter, that's the life of a Sea Monkey...short.

I'm more facinated by the girl's hair than the necklace, I'm thinking spiders are living in there.

Stars Antique Mall Update

I've moved into a second spot in Stars and Splendid. I share it with my friend Paula, it's right next to my first spot, and right across the aisle from her regular spot. In my old space I do kitschy, fun, pop culture, and toys, but in the new shared spot, we're doing primitives, antiques, and somewhat of a farm house thing. It gives us both a chance to do what we love in our old spots and something different in the new one. Paula is a master of color, design, and reclamation, and me with my whole "Retro" thing.

The colors in both our regular spaces are striking, bright, primary reds, yellows, blues, as well as vintage and mod colors like pink and chartreuse. The new spot will allow us to have natural wood tones, chippy whites, accented with glass, enamel ware, and pottery. We'll use classic themes like books, garden, and vintage black tech (typewriters, old cameras...that sorta stuff) to spice it up.

During the Holidays it'll give us a chance to really shine with vintage Halloween, Christmas, Valentines...all without having to re-make our normal spots. Fun and good for me having to think outside my normal world of Hot Rods and Tiki Lights.

It is in Stars and Splendid, right next to Spot 37, and right across from spot 77...NEW 37/77!








There are links to the Mall in Departures and also down the right column further in an ad box.